Friday, March 15, 2013

'The Guard'

So, yesterday, as we were working with the carpenter on the bed frame specs, we of course had a visit from the Housemaid.

I forgot to lock the front gate.

I was a little perturbed at myself, to say the least.

She likes to meddle in our financial business and I kept asking her what it was she needed, while at the same time, trying to speak to the carpenter about the bed.

She would keep telling me, "No, finish with him and we'll talk."

Right, so you can find out how much he's charging us and get him to ask for a little more for you?

No thanks.

Seriously, Papi, you need to learn your Spanish so I'm not the only one chatting!!!

Finally, I isolated her downstairs, turned on Google Translate, who happens to be my best friend since arriving here, and began to ask what she specifically needed.

She pulled out a letter from her husband, the Dominican Daddy.

I typed it into the translator and found out some information that scared the hell out of me.

You see, we had 'The Guard' outside our house while the wall was being put up.

I suppose she trusted him to be there, because we were inside and he was just staying outdoors.

I trusted him, because he was the Dominican Daddy's cousin, and thought he was trustworthy if they were telling us to have him work for us.

Anyway, I had asked him to come watch Casa Paraíso while we are at the capitol next week, working on our residency.

Bad move.

First, he came to our house asking for an advance, because he was out of baby formula.

I paid him in advance for one day, then told him I'd pay him for the 2nd day when we returned.

The letter from the Dominican Daddy asked me if what I had paid 'The Guard' was for both days in advance, then went on to explain why he was asking in much more terrifying words.

He explained that even though he is his cousin, that we can't trust him.

The Housemaid then explained he's been in jail for robbery, not to mention is currently being investigated for robbing the last place he worked at as 'security'.

He sets up people for going away, then while they're gone, he and his fellow bandidos rob the person who he is supposed to be 'protecting'.

We've learned it happens a lot here, via the Pool Man and the DR1 Forum.

The Dominican Daddy told us he and his wife, the Housemaid, would watch the place.  I can trust them, as they don't overtly steal.  They just do it in the sneaky way, where they think we're not going to notice.

If they take a little toothpaste, tampons and soap while we're gone, it's much better than our computer, TV et al.  So be it.

Not to mention, he knows he would lose monthly income if he didn't take care of our place.  Plus, I really do believe that even though these two are opportunists, they have our protection in mind.

We told him we'd give him both our guns and asked the Housemaid if she could find a way to tell 'The Guard' we don't need his services.  I asked her to tell him in such a way that won't make us a target for his anger, making us his next victim.

We also asked her to tell him that we'd find another way to have him work off the money we paid him for baby formula.

Or not.

Maybe with a dude that terrifying, we want to just tell him it's a baby shower gift and leave it at that.

He has already begged us for money each and every time he sees us.  It's not like he's going to stop.

How does he think WE responsible for HIM not keeping IT in his pants?

He's not our dependent, yet somehow, he feels that we owe him, just because we're white and don't live in a shack.

Dude.  If you can't be responsible enough, and have 4 babies all over the place, honestly, it's nobody's fault but your own.

Keep your pecker in your pants!

Somehow, we have to keep the guy on our side though.

Maybe formula here and there will buy us some peace?

Or maybe it will set us up for more extortion?

All I know is, I'm a little scared of 'The Guard', and very grateful that the Dominican Daddy is on our side.

i trust in my ability to keep us safe in our future


  1. My bullshit alarm is ringing Full Fuck Off Alert!

    I dunno coz I am not you guys... n I am not there. I really feel for ya. Wish u had no bs to deal with.

    Damn lousy bitch just keeps setting you up! Myself I would be at the point of

    * Fuck the Dominican Daddy.
    * Fuck his meddling hand in your bank account wife.
    * Fuck their recommendations.
    * Fuck their cousin they no longer trust?

    WTF?!? indeed!

    Is there anyone there you can trust to watch your place?

    Can you take your laptop and guns with you? Screw giving them a gun. Hide them. Bury in yard etc.

    U might get some bs story how it was "lost" or "stolen in a fight" protecting your place. Coz truth is they sold them on you.


    They must be afraid of some people there. Lol

    What about your neighbors guards?

    I'm peeved at these people constantly screwin with you.

    Man i wish you could get a big group of decent fearless trustworthy
    folks who are on vacation- to stay at your place.
    And if anyone tries to rob you - they can shoot them in the face!

    1. well, it seems i have a little bit more than 'the guard' and all the extortionists right now.

      i can't even deal with that right now.

      life just got fucked. fucked up really bad.


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