here's a new one ...

So sick.

Shit.  Quite literally.

At least I know it's not a parasite.  The way it came on was completely unlike the parasites I've had before.

And besides, I'm behaving myself and not eating the salad.  I have my Brace Face to thank for that.  I still can't chew salad with ease.

Anyway, I got something, and I'm assuming it was Montezuma's Revenge.  I've never had that one before.  I thought it was food poisoning, but having had food poisoning a few times in my life, I can safely say food poisoning is much more violent.

I braced myself for the worst while I was clinging to the walls of the bathroom anyway.

We were on our way out to the supermercado to get snacks when it hit me.

I thought I just had gas.

Well, I did have gas, but it turned into much, much more as I asked in a frenzied way, "Donde esta el bano?!?!"

When we returned from the store, Papi dropped me off at the front of the hotel and went to park the car.

As much as I'm studying Spanish, I still get things wrong, like the last trip, when I tried to say, "I'm hungry," but instead said, "I have man."

I did it again yesterday, only this time, they didn't laugh.  They took it seriously.

I tried to walk up the 3 tiny stairs to the lobby, but I was on the verge of passing out.  I couldn't walk.

The security came to ask me if I needed help, and I tried to say, "I'm sick."

He could totally understand by the way I was pale, shaking and unable to walk that there was something wrong.

I was grateful that they walked me to the little buggy to drive me home, but damn!  Once we were in that little cart, we didn't need to go so fast!

They were speeding in and out of people, one swerve shy of honking and I thought, "Gee!  They're really being sweet about this!"

Then we arrived at the medic and Papi saying, "No doctor!  Just go home."

I was trying to agree, "Si, dormitorio," but I was too crampy, faint and nauseas to spit out the words with conviction.

Finally they got it and drove us to our room, helping me up the stairs.  They looked so worried and said, "If it is not better, call the doctor!"  I understood enough to get it.

I agreed and collapsed in the bed, until my body erupted, expunging the poisons from my system.

It wasn't until a little bit later, that I realized I may have said the wrong thing to those poor souls who were speeding me to get help.

I remembered, because when I was staying with my Eternal Friend for those 2 weeks, she was helping me study my Spanish, and told me I confused 'nurse' and 'sick'.

I decided to look it up on Google Translate and sure enough, I said, "enfermera," instead of, "enferma."

Easy enough mistake, and that would be why they rushed me to the medic.

Papi said that everyone in the resort was looking at the drama, and now I have to face the whole place who are wondering if I'm dying.

I'm so damn embarrassed, but such is the life of someone learning a new language.

It's not much different than when we try to say, "I love you," on our cell phones and it comes out, "I lice you."

I won't be leaving the room today.

However, I do have an update for you about The Hotel Shark. 

We went snorkeling and now I get it.  It didn't hit a shark or a whale.  It was indeed a sand dune, but the reason it felt slimy is because it's covered in that gross grass that waves around!!!

That's more disgusting than anything!!!  EWWWWWW!!!

When I feel better, I'll still be sticking to the shallow end.

For now, I'll be lying here in the room, eating bananas.

i have a positive attitude about what i eat, how i eat, and when i eat