Tuesday, February 21, 2012

Boifriend Cuddles

What's good for the goose isn't necessarily good for the gander.

You know my lovely Valentine's Hearts that have filled our ceiling space?

So far, I've had My Gratitude Buddy and My Boifriend over and neither of them found them to be very sweet.

They didn't like the fact that they have creative pieces of file folders tapping them in the head as they walked through our tiny space of a dungeon suite.

"Doesn't this drive you crazy?!?!"


Actually, Papi and I both love them.  We both want them to stay up for a little while longer.

My love came up with the reason.

It's our celebration of love.

Our loving hearts fill our home and they're for us, and no one else.

I will allow every little love filled piece of paper to gently rub across my forehead as I walk through the room.

Not to mention, we've both found secret little pathways to get around them when we don't want to be tickled by their presence.

I do have to say, the other day I accidentally slept in and only had 5 minutes to get ready and 15 minutes to get to my destination.

That was when they weren't very much fun.

A couple of them got knocked down from flailing of arms as I put on a shirt and walked at the same time.

But none-the-less, our hearts are still very present.

They're for us.

This is why they're still there.

Not all of us are made for one another.

I have a friend who just had a horrible breakup, and she blames herself.

From what I heard about the story, they just weren't a good match.

We can try all we want when we have a difficult relationship, but if we're not made for one another, we really need to take a step back and ask ourselves if this is the right path.

There is nothing wrong with loving the person who isn't right for us.

As a matter of fact, one of the hardest things to do is love someone we can't live with.

I do know that if Papi and I weren't the 'match' we needed, we never would have made it through the first year of this male transformation.

Let me tell you how much I loved my cuddles yesterday.

I had some snuggles during the day when Papi had gone out for a chat with a friend, and I stayed home being consoled by My Boifriend.

I'm still not better from the medication withdrawal.  I'm still on crackers and running to the washroom when there's the slightest trouble in tummy land.

I rested my head against his lap, curled beside him like a puppy, and it was so wonderful just to lie and have someone sit near me.

Later, I had my spooning from Papi and it finished off my day beautifully.

I had all the love I needed throughout this week from my amazingly wonderful friends.

Still, it comes back to, I need my love to hold me for all of my life.

loving myself heals my life.  i nourish my mind, body and soul


  1. Loving yourself is probably the most important part, admittedly a skill I have yet to master.

  2. You seriously are soulmates. The things you two have been through are probably the BIGGEST tests I have ever read about.

    I hope that sentence just made sense...You know what I'm sayin'

    1. it's true rafa :) and yes it makes sense. i think about it all the time.

      having someone who works at the relationship as hard as we both do makes me confident in our lives.

      i'm very fortunate to have met my mate.

  3. this post brought a big smile to my face. I love the love that you and Papi share xoxo

  4. Indeed, the hearts are yours...you and E's. And anyone who doesn't like it can just bugger off if you ask me.

    And I agree, it is hard to love someone whome you don't fit with, but even harder to admit that they aren't the right fit. Hence why so many of us stay miserable. It takes courage to love ourselves enough to let go.

    And well, you two have something beautiful and great...and I am SOOO jealous. LOL

    1. behr, don't be jealous ... the heartache i had to go through to find my true soul mate balances it out :)


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