Monday, May 16, 2011

Papi's at it again!

First off, I have to say I'm sorry there aren't any pictures to show you yet.  Papi and I have been having so much fun that there just hasn't been time to get any computer time in.

which is the point i think?  so why am i here?!

However, I felt the need to get here and say hi to 'you', my imaginary friend, so here I am.  Papi is up doing money things.  For some reason, my card won't work here.

eek! the people love us, but the atm doesn't

I have to vent now.  I'm on holiday.  I shouldn't have to deal with tranny issues, right?

not if papi can help it ... my love has my undivided attention

Somehow I'm being held hostage by the Tranny Terrorist, who is yakking about things I just don't want to think about.

The chin hair.

I look at it frequently.  It's hard to take my eyes off it.  Now I will admit that there is definitely more there than there was before.

Then there was the back of the leg hair that just jumped out and decided to give us a scare.

jeeeeeeeezus!  where the fuck did that come from?!?!?!

I've been strict with Papi about shaving leg hair because I still want to hang on to my butch for as long as I can.  I would never date anyone with the hairy lesbian look, so I've not wanted my love to have any hair there.

It will look quite ridiculous if my love has upper leg hair and no lower leg hair, you know what I mean?!?!?

So I suppose the 'rules' are changing.

I did catch a glimpse of the 'male' my love is morphing into.  It was a bit disastrous for me.  It made me want to cry about the life I'm losing.

While we were enjoying our time, we saw two very pleasing fags who looked to be completely in love.  It made my heart melt.  I had pride that in this day and age, we queers can show our love in public without fear.

to a point ...

Then I realized that Papi and I would never be seen as the sweet dyke couple anymore.  I will now be just the boring straight girl.  I will no longer be the femme.

It really is difficult here in the Dominican when men won't speak to me when it's Papi and I together.  They speak to my love as the 'man' and I am just the sidekick wife.  I am not equal.

It is really hard to be seen as a straight couple, and I'm having my first glimpse of forever being just that.

One thing that was really strange today was seeing my love's beautiful breasts in a different light.

Papi finally bared those gorgeous breasts and I looked at them with contradiction.  They really didn't look like they belonged.

I've never seen this before, but there it was.  Papi is really just having a breast reduction in a different way.  They're not going to hang and flop like some dude who has man tits.  They'll be perk and flat.

As a matter of fact, that sweet belly of Papi's will be sticking out more than those flat pectorals.


So, there's some good, some bad, some strange, but overall?

I'm not feeling the grief quite as much as I thought I would with The Countdown to doomsday.  I'm just enjoying my time with Papi.  I'm looking at the beginning of my life changing along with Papi.  It's terrifying and I want to resist, but I'm still going along with this crazy ride.

Except for when Papi starts asking things like, "Ok, so when we're in Florida and the operation is done, you have to contact 'x' and 'x' and 'x' and tell them I'm ok."

Then when I don't answer my love asks, "Why aren't you speaking?"

"Because my dear.  I'm on holiday.  There will be no Tranny Terrorism while I'm on holiday."


  1. you're amazing. i can only imagine how hard it must be to be assumed "straight". whether we admit it or not, so many of us are really entwined with our "queerness". i know i'd hate to be assumed straight. because i'm not. whether i'm dating a man, or even a woman, i'm NOT straight. i don't have any words of wisdom for that feeling. i don't know what you can do to make it feel better. but i DO know, that there must be something. so let's start looking. so you can feel better. so people can see the gorgeous femme that you are! and your queerness. and E's queerness. because whether the public sees E as a man or not, they're still queer, too.
    enjoy your gaycation my dear! and if you can fit it in before Florida, let's talk. my dime. if you want, that is.
    kisses to both of you

  2. You are always Femme. Never forget that

  3. Oh A, just have a great time sweetie! Yeah, no Tranny Terrorism when on lovely holidays!
    Stay safe guys!

  4. Didn't look like they belonged ??
    I'm laughing here cos that's what I said.

    Nothing else to say, well I do but you're on holiday so it can wait :)

    Thanks for the carribean dot on my map too ! X

  5. @oc, i'm struggling. it's almost like i'm fading away :(

    @anonymous, i will do my best not to forget, thank you for stopping by, even as anonymous xo

    @psycho, papi has to lay off lol! i think my love is figuring it out :)

    @dirty, it's so exciting to have the dot on my map too lol! it's so cool :)

    love you all ... gonna go blog about today! so beautiful!

  6. darling, you're not fading away, you just need to find a NEW way! and you will. WE will. i promise. time. that's all. i mean, hell, you're climbing mountains now!

  7. :) ty oc ... we'll get there xo


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