You suck old man sweaty balls.

Dearest gentlemen who read my blog:

Thank you for being gentlemen.

And to the dreg of the earth, 50 year old virgin, living in your parents' basement, satan spawn who reads my blog to jack off to:

Fuck off.

Well, the time has come to take options for 'anonymous' comments off my page, since a creep wrote a gross comment yesterday, which I'm sure was supposed to be some kind of (ummmm?) compliment?

dude ... there's a reason you're still a virgin ... you really need to work on your pick up lines

If you read anonymously, know that you can always email me if you'd like to say something that now can't be posted here on my blog.

at least there i can block scum.

Just because I speak candidly about my sexuality doesn't mean I'm writing for filth to get off on.

And seriously?

To read my ranting, whining, moaning about my flu seems like the entry to write your crud?

Wow.

I'll be sure not to moan about flus and colds from now on if that brings out the waste of the world.

ok but really! my fever went up to 99.8!! c'mon! it was awful! oooh ... does that turn you on?

This slimeball wouldn't even know what to do with a lesbian in bed.

I remember when one of my dyke friends decided they'd sleep with a guy to see what it was like.  Her review?

"It was quick and painless."

Exactly.

Poor Papi.  My love got really upset about the excrement that was smeared on the walls of my comments.  Mi esposo has a bit of trouble keeping calm when someone disrespects me.

Papi got all up in a tizzy when I got into a fight with a guy on the road.  He was driving like an idiot and cut me off.

I pulled up beside him to speak my mind and the next thing you know, Papi was getting out of the car to fight.

Ok.

So, that would seem like a typical thing for a man to do, and the guy yelled something like, "I'll fuck you up boy!"

What this slime didn't know was that this was only a week after my love got back from the top surgery and couldn't even lift a hand, never mind an arm to swing.

me thinks i would've had to do the fighting that day!!!

Anyway, my love wanted to climb through the computer screen when Papi read the turd that was left in my toilet.

Ah, Papi, thank you for defending your femme.

And you know, your 5 Foot Clitoris is much bigger than this guy's penis.

I promise you.