Tuesday, January 24, 2012

Sorry. Try again.

I'm exhausting Papi with all the driving around I'm making him do for me.

It may be trouble for my love to drive me to all the places I need to go to in a day, but I like the non-stop company of mi esposo.

At least in the car I can have a conversation with him.

That's hard to do when we're home, because my love has put down the Sims-O-Rama-Banana-Fana-Ding-Dong-Land, and taken up his extra breathing moments with Rock Band.

Which I was confused about.  I didn't realize there's more than one guitar game.

I was corrected.  It is not Guitar Hero.  It is Rock Band.  All I know is you don't want to be a musician to play this game.  It will reverse any schooling you've had in music.

Anyway, yes.

When we're home, my love flits off into never never land and plays games.   I can think of worse things to be addicted to, really.

Yesterday, we were given a blog to read about the word 'Tranny'.  Of course, I read it, while my love played with the whammy bar, and tilted his guitar up like any other rock god.

In a nutshell, the blog was asking that people refrain from using the word 'Tranny', as it can be used as a derogative term.

Kinda like when people spit out the word, "Dyke," at those deemed scum of the earth to the bigots and homophobes around the world.

I don't mind being called a dyke.  Even when it's spit out at me in hatred.

I mean really, as a femme, being recognized in my own community is like asking the world of people.

As if having long hair and wearing a skirt makes me any less attracted to butches.  I come across my own struggles in my community.

I also understand the need to keep our community safe.

However, using the word 'Tranny', and other words like "Fag," is not the problem.

Not using these words will not keep anyone safe while the world has bible thumping zealots brainwashing their children to hate those who don't follow their rules.

My love likes being called a 'Tranny'.  Why should that be taken away from him, because there are crud in the world that will stop at nothing to kill off those who think differently?

Do you really think for a second that not using that word is going to make anyone person any safer from evil?

It's not.

The only way to make this world safer is to expose to the zealots that we are living creatures who believe we deserve to live our lives with love.


Be a zealot!

It's not going to hurt us, unless you physically use it for hate.

What if I promised a zealot that I would never ever use the word again?

Do you really think that's going to change their mind?


They'll use the word instead while they're in the process of thinking how to kill the young transgender person, in the name of their god.

I'd rather continue saying the word and making it more common in our vocabulary, so that these hateful people can't make others feel bad when they hurl these terms at them through their venom.

Call me a dyke?

Why, thank you very much!  I'm glad you noticed.  Lord knows the lesbians in my community can't tell.

Call Papi a Tranny?

Why yes he is.

Let's see you try to use it against my love.  Sticks and stones bitches.

reality is in our perception of it ... no matter what happens externally, it's all about how we perceive and deal with whatever comes ...


  1. Love it A. I expressed those exact same sentiments. Haters are not going to stop using those words. But every time it is spoken with love and respect rather than hate it lessens the impact of the haters.

    1. i say keep using words unless they harm someone. if they don't like me using the word with them, i won't.

      but i can't live for everyone else, ya know? i'm not here to hurt anyone. i'm here so people have someone they can relate to.

  2. You tell it like it is girl!! I just wanted to add something new to this soup...This might explain why guys like Dick van Dyke never changed his name. I mean consider the alternative.

    Penis van Lesbian..

    I don't think he would have gotten the Mary Poppins job if that was his name..

    1. lmao! penis van lesbian! i think i've found a new alter ego!!!

  3. Gawds Andrea, with every post you write here, I love ya more and more.

    I have felt the same way for years about the dreaded word "Tranny" (or Dyke, or Fag, or Homo, or Queer for that matter).

    Words only have the power WE give them. And I am frankly so fucking sick of this "Oh, poor me, I am the victim.", bullshit. I am not discrediting the experiences of any member of the Trans-communty at all. I am merely saying that it is pathetic that they would let a word have so much power. People who hate trans-folk are gonna hate us no matter what words come out of their mouth. I am more worried about actual actions and deeds than words. Do you think the word "tranny" came out of the mouths of those involved in the beating of a trans-woman in the bathroom of McDonalds in Baltimore? I can assure it didn't. How about the thousands more hate crimes? More than likely not. I'd be willing to bet other words were used...and far more hateful ones at that.

    Anywho, I am ranting....so I'll shut up....but I will also conclude....again, BRAVO!! Thanks for keeping it real.

    1. thank you for the rant :) you made me happy.

      we all need to protect one another, and be visible while we do it.

      this new generation needs to know there's all walks of life. no hiding behind terminology.


      laugh at ourselves people.

  4. Thank you darlin' for another amazing read.

  5. I agree with all of it, that's really all I have to say.
    A rose by any other name all that....

    Loving your new alter ego too :)


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