Papi found out yesterday that the top surgery is covered. The panel consisting of two shrinks dubbed my love a 'true' transgendered person.
Now mi esposo can go on the waiting list to get those scrumptious breasts removed from my loving eyes, and forever I will be without a soft pillow to lay my head against when there's an affectionate hug.
But, there's a problem in Papi's world. The waiting list is horribly long.
It will take months to wait just to get the letters sent to the appropriate bureaucratic boss man, more months after that to get a consultation, then a good 8-12 months on a waiting list to actually get it done.
Too long for someone who wants them gone the moment the decision to transform was uttered.
Papi wants to get it done now. My love is madly typing to surgery centers in Florida and San Fransisco, as well as leaving voice mails for them to receive on Monday.
There is hope that it will be done sooner this way. There is also a hefty bill. A good 10K. This scares me.
We just got out of debt, and I'm wearing the ring that is supposed to cover my jaw surgery. Now my love wants to sell this 1 karat engagement ring that looks so pretty on my hand.
at least i still get to keep mine! not a hope in hell i'll part with that baby
I suggested we get out of the debt from our holiday to the Dominican Republic we already booked, save a little money and then sell a few things. This way my love could get it done in the coming winter, instead of waiting close to 2 years.
I would even sell my cello for Papi, but my love wants it NOW!!!
Whip out the plastic and get in there to start the mutilation.
Time to breathe through a new spiral of debt that we just seemed to get out of from the wedding, rings and honeymoon.
This terrifies me almost as much as the surgery.
My love grew up getting everything that was wanted, as soon as it was asked for.
We are not rich like the friends Papi grew up with. We will be hurting for the cash, and I look at this ring and wonder if my needed jaw surgery won't happen.
Then there's the other half of the stomach turning.
Mi esopso being cut.
I can understand the need for my love to get this done now. Papi doesn't like that I'm not ecstatic about it.
There are times that my love will say, "I know YOU'RE not happy about it ... but," and I will cringe. It makes me feel like I'm on the other side of the planet from Papi.
The thing is, I'd rather have it done sooner as well. This way I can just get the tears out now, versus waiting for the inevitable.
The wave of mutilation.
It would just be easier on me to get it over with and grieve over my love's body part, than it would be to watch the time come closer like the predator gaining speed down that dark alley.
Closer and closer, time is decreasing space. It's pale, boney hand, with yellowed nails reaching toward me is accompanied by an evil smile that will turn into a maniacal laugh when it finally has me in it's grasp.
hey ... if it's gonna happen, let's just get it over with ...
Which is the villain?