Day one back to work.
I was a bit nervous, but I only had to work 4 hours as my gradual return. At least they didn't stick me with the bible thumper.
It hardly brought up pain.
But I'll tell you, I am not a morning person. Getting up at 6:45 is not an ability of mine. The snooze button was my best friend this morning.
It was good to wake up however, as in one of my dreams I was being raped by this intimidating bull dyke that's in our community.
I may be a little nervous the next time I see her. Ah, my dreams. NEVER a dull moment.
So, I have to tell you, I am starting to find humour in the strangest places in my journey. It's a good thing. It's the only way to heal. Especially when it's time to think about Papi's top surgery.
It's all about my love's top surgery. Shit! Even the fucking calendar is about top surgery. Remember the calendar of F-Ms I spoke about? The one where I pasted on mi esposo's face on every page, so I could actually look at it?
Do you remember that April was supposed to be a bad thing to look at and that all I thought it could be was that picture that scarred me for life? You remember the pic don't you? Well, if you don't, you'll have to do some forensic reading and go back a few months.
Anyway, I digress ...
This month's pic is not the one that scarred me for life. It's one of someone who still had their fucking tubes in from the top surgery. Why the hell anyone would want to have that as their pic of pride, I don't know.
But it's all about top surgery. Papi said, "I feel so sorry for you. These breasts are so nice. It's really too bad. Some pictures of people I've seen in the gallery are just not so nice."
memories of hairy breasts ... horrible scars ...
Papi continued, "Why can't they be detachable so I could put them on and you could have your way with them?!"
I laughed, "Maybe they could sew them on to me. I'd rather have yours."
Maybe one day they'll come up with this option? Then when those who have gender dysphoria experience a day where they feel like they could have breasts, they could wear them.
Not sure how many people are feeling like they're both female and male, but I do know they're out there.
I like my love's pillowy fun bags and I really wish I could have them.
It's such a shame. They really are gorgeous.
One of my blogger friends told me that upon looking at pictures of Papi, that they just couldn't imagine breasts there. That it didn't suit my love.
I suppose so.
But damn! Couldn't I have them? A breast transplant?
If you're going to just hack 'em off anyway ...