Saturday, April 9, 2011

I wonder ...

I have a codeine hangover.

It's not unlike the ones I used to get when I was drinking.  It comes complete with nausea, irritability and a headache that hurts with every step my feet will take.  The only thing missing is Buffalo Mouth.

Have you met the buffalo?

It likes to sleep in drunks' mouths through the night, so that when you wake up the next day you have arid, thick, muddied fur coating your teeth and tongue.

I remember one of the worst hangovers I ever had quite vividly.  This hangover was one of the tortures I inflicted upon myself that keeps me clean and sober, by way of reminding me I don't drink like 'normy' people.

It was after winning the local radio contest; 'Molson Canadian Blind Date', where a small group of 200 people are brought to a secret location for a secret big name band to play for them.  But the best part for this drunk, was the 'all you can drink' beer.

We got to see INXS, along with drinking 'Molson Canadian' draft beer.  It's not a beer I'd normally have chosen to drink, but hell, it was free.

I double fisted those bitches right up to last call.

The next day, my head hurt so bad I couldn't walk.  Every step was like a canon going off in my brain.  I literally had to crawl on the floor to get to the water to wash the buffalo fur out of my mouth.

Well, today I didn't have to crawl, but I certainly had to tread lightly to be sure this headache didn't defy me.

I gingerly took the stairs from our attic, our temporary bedroom, two flights down to our basement suite.

monday!  monday they say we get our lovely king size bed back .... ahhhhhhhh ... no more attic dwelling!

I would truly make a great burglar.  I can walk so quiet that even a bird wouldn't know I was sneaking up on them.  It's actually a technique I developed as a child.  You did NOT want to wake my mother up before her sleep was over.

There would be hell to pay if you did.

I had a crash course in learning how to sneak.

As I came around the corner, oh so softly as to not disturb my aching head, I find Papi at the tail end of self-administering hormones.

oh for fucks sakes!!!!!!

My love tried to wrap things up as swiftly as possible, and I tried to pretend it just wasn't happening.

It wasn't a great start to a 'good morning sweetheart' greeting.  Like a horse with blinders, I ignored the box of needles, the bright yellow sharps container and the nervous greeting from Papi.

"Were you trying to sneak up on me?"

"No, my head is pounding from the codeine.  Fucking awesome eh?"

"You really do have impeccable timing."

Yes.

Yes I do.

It seems I'm supposed to keep getting glimpses of this poison that my love has to inject into that ass I love.

It seems these are my baby steps to getting used to it.

I wonder if I ever will?

I wonder ...

12 comments:

  1. I love buffalo mouth! It's much better than bison butt...that just plain hurts. :P

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  2. welcome to my lunacy dr. heckle :)

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  3. ravi thank you and welcome to my pondering page

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  4. I guess it because we have no buffalo here but I have woke up before now with the impression that one of the cats has been sleeping on my tongue.

    You might never get used to it, but I'm sure you'll learn to cope with how it makes you feel x

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  5. ah yes dirty ... i think that's about all i can ask for ...

    so funny that you are here ... was just thinking about you. your ears must've been burning :)

    xo

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  6. saw the Molson Canadian and had to go back to your profile to see where you're at: Vancouver! I'm from Chilliwack, well, not anymore, but I was as a teenager.
    Anyway, I'll have to go back and read more of your posts because I'm curious as to why Papi is getting hormonen injections. This is the most interesting blog. You are so open and authentic, I find myself riveted to your every word...ok, going to learn more about you!

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  7. oooo ... tread lightly sandra ... there's some heavy stuff back in nov/dec.

    good luck :)

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  8. I've met the buffalo. I think sometimes he brings a few friends.

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  9. rafa ... welcome to my world ... i just visited yours ... good times! just loved it

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  10. Hey A,
    Buffalo, Bison, even Dragon, the morning after always sucks. Every nerve disconnected tries to reconnect the minute you open your eyes.
    Remember when we used to crawl on all fours? Then we learned to stand, then walk and sprint? It was painful in the beginning because we fell so many times, but we just kept on, because we want to, we need to. Maybe it may take a while, but I never underestimate the "will".

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  11. I think in time you will get more use to everything!

    Sorry I haven't been around! I've been so tired lately!

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